Do you ever stress about your kids’ future? Do you ever stress that you’re not good enough for what they need?
What can you do about it?
This morning I received a private message from an online friend, who I thought beautifully put in to words some of the worries and insecurities we all feel from time to time. Here is my response to her:
I feel you! Lots of moms (me included) get angsty about their kids potential, needs and opportunities.
There are a few things you need to keep foremost in your mind:
- There are things that are yours to do.
- There are things that are your kids’ to do.
- Don’t confuse them, and don’t underestimate the power of them.
- If you do your best to do all that is yours to do, and NOTHING that is theirs to do, I guarantee you the best possible outcome. Period.
You have to trust that no deficit, no obstacle, no disappointment will stand in the way of your children becoming all they can and should be.
It’s not all up to us. Thank heaven!!
Show them what it looks like to be deliberate about life, to follow your joy and serve with commitment and a heart of compassion, to exceed your own limitations through effort and grace. Show them.
Remove any toxic, distracting, or addictive influences in their lives, and give them the raw materials and model to follow so that they can become life-long self educators. The greatest men and women always are.
Not every child comfortably fits into this mold. Some with special needs or traumas or health issues have a mission that’s not easy to put in a tidy phrase. But the same rules apply: You do you. They do them.
This is the only way. For real. We deceive ourselves when we trust in any other plan.
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